Showing posts with label your. Show all posts
Showing posts with label your. Show all posts

April 27, 2013

When Your Life is Filled with Whining and Nagging

Oh, well. Thank you for being here. I just want to share my feeling, as usual. "When Your Life is Filled with Whining and Nagging" is a really suitable title for me. I have been whined and nagged lately. I am not a big fan of better-not-to-mention place, but I'm not a hater also. It's not that I hate the peoples, I just don't like something there, and this something is really hard to explain.

I have read some books, telling that whining just waste our time. True. But it can't help me keep away from doing it. The more I enter the deeper part of the place, the more I found myself disappointed. Sometimes I hope there's a real scene like in the Mean Girl movie when we can reveal what bothers us without being afraid of the bullies. But since we are in the real world where many evil people live, we have to leave it behind.

Just accept what you get. Be grateful of what you have. Not so many people are lucky like me. Moreover, not so many people are unlucky like me. Life is fair though it doesn't seem so. To bury my jealousy and to burn my haughty, I have to believe that He gives what I need, not only what I want. If I can do it, I will live in peace.

August 19, 2011

"Don't you give up, keep your chin up, and be happy!"

Udah beberapa kali ini gw ngepost hal yang nggak penting di blog. Yah, sebenernya bagi gw sih penting2 aja. Tapi kan nggak tau menurut temen2 gimana. Well, pasti udah denger kan kalo gw udah lulus, hehe. Euforianya udah ilang dari beberapa minggu yang lalu, sekarang masih jadi pengangguran...

Berkaitan dengan rencana gw untuk liburan dan mukin di Kediri, gw jadi bingung mau ngelamar di mana. Sebelumnya, gw berencana untuk  ngelamar di Labschool. Tapi, karena sekolah itu buka lowongannya tahun ajaran baru, berarti gw masih nunggu beberapa bulan. Beberapa sekolah swasta yang berkualitas juga gitu. Sambil nunggu buka lowongan, gw mau ngelamar di bimbel atau malah ngerintis bikin bimbel sendiri... Selain karena pembukaan lowongan, gw sama 5 temen gw berencana backpacking ke Singapur di bulan Oktober nanti. Tiket pesawat dan hostel udah beres, tanggal udah fix, dan karena kita berenam kesana bukan pas hari libur jadi nggak enak kalo kerja di sekolah. Selain itu, akhir tahun ini gw juga berencana mau mukim di Kampung Inggris, Kediri selama dua bulan. Kalo kata Bapak gw sih, semedi. Kalo kata gw, reinkarnasi.

Tapi sodara2, rencana gw terancam batal karena tiba2 Bapak-Ibu gw nyuruh2 gw buruan ngelamar kerja di sekolah. Sambil nunggu lowongan sekolah2 yang diinginkan, gw bisa ngelamar di sekolah2 yang ada di sekitar gw. Parah dah. Bahkan baru aja gw selesai sidang Bapak bilang, "Udah sana rajin2 bikin lamaran..." Jleb banget. Hahaha... Artinya, rencana ke Kediri batal, dan ke Singapur...hm...diusahakan...hm...harus jadilah! Wong tiketnya udah beli.

Rencana gw sekarang sih, gw mau jalanin Ramadhan dulu. Dan yang pasti puas2in ketemu seseorang yang bela2in nggak mudik sama keluarganya dan memilih lebaran sendirian di Jakarta demi bisa sama2 gw (dan mungkin beberapa orang terdekat lainnya) lebih lama karena abis lebaran dy harus buru2 ke luar kota. Hiks. Seseorang yang tadi pagi2 buta udah gw bikin kesel dan khawatir sama kelakuan gw yang bahkan nggak ngerti kenapa gw ngelakuin itu. Maaf ya sayang. I promise not to do it again. I am really sorry for everything I'd said and done. It's just...my childish fear couldn't compromize with everything last night, and I brought it 'til this morning. I was wrong.

Oke. Balik ke soal akademik gw. Wisuda. Yeay!! Sesuatu yang gw tunggu2. Seperti yang gw bilang, gw bakal wisuda tanggal 24 September, dan itu bertepatan dengan hari ulang tahun gw yang ke-22. Seneng banget, ya Allah! Yah, walaupun pasti lebih sempurna lagi kalo Monda Perdana sebagai pacar bisa hadir dan bawain gw kue, bunga, dan boneka. Hehehe. Ngarep bener. Sayangnya, pacar gw ini nggak bisa dateng. Pastinya dy lagi ada di Surabaya, kuliah--dan kerja. Dalam waktu 1 tahun, biasanya pegawai nggak dikasih waktu cuti, simpelnya sih itu artinya MP nggak akan balik dalam waktu setahun. Mudah2an aja gw cepet dapet kerja, supaya punya duit buat ngunjungin MP kesana. Nggak bisa ngebayangin kalo bener2 nggak bisa ketemu, hehe.

Oh iya, ngomong2, resolusi tahun 2011 gw hampir tercapai semua masa... Padahal kan masih setengah tahun lebih dikit. Asik banget deh... Hehehe. Senang sekali deh!!! Walaupun ngedapetinnya nggak gampang dan banyak hambatan, gw nggak nyangka gw bisa.

December 18, 2010

RESOLUSI TAHUN 2011

1. Jadi Sarjana Pendidikan Bahasa Inggris UNJ
2. Beli Netbook pake duit sendiri
3. Nurunin berat badan jadi 49 kg
4. Bisa satu taunan sama...ehm...pacar
Semoga tercapai. Amin. -kilaz
Yang belum tercapai cuma resolusi yang nomer 4. Insya Allah, akan tercapai, dan sangat ingin tercapai. MP pernah nanya gini, "Kok cuma satu tahunan? Berarti abis satu tahun putus dong...?" Trus gw jawab deh, kalo nggak ada satu tahun, nggak akan ada dua tahun, tiga tahun, empat, lima, dua puluh, lima puluh, sampe mati. Bener kan temen2?

Ngomong2, ada hal yang sangat gw suka dari bulan Ramadhan. Kenapa? Karena gw bisa ketemu temen2 yang udah lama banget nggak ketemu--temen SD, SMP, SMA, kuliah. Ahh!! Kangen. Dan momennya sekarang tepat banget. Abis banyak yang lulus (buat yang belum lulus, harus tetep semangat ya, yang penting bukan lulus tepat waktu, tapi lulus pada waktu yang tepat). Obrolannya juga udah 180 derajat. Banyak yang udah ngomongin kerjaan. Hahaha. Yah, walaupun gw sendiri belom kerja, tapi menarik aja dengernya. Banyak yang bilang sih, sebenernya kerja nggak enak. But I'm still excited to hear about it. Surely, there will be obstacles after other obstacles, right? Because life doesn't end when we graduate, but life has just begun after it. What's different is, we will no longer be carried on our parents backs but stand by our own feet. -kilaz
It is you and me against the world. Don't waste your time for tomorrow. With you by my side, I can do anything. You and me against the world. Goodbye to all of our sorrows. So let's just put them aside. Put all the worries behind us. -Mocca

July 13, 2011

A song for your suck ex-lover: I'm not sorry there's nothing to save...

I've found a song when I was watching Daydream Nation movie. The song is cool. It tells about Someone who meet his/her ex-lover long after they broke up. The ex was suck. (S)he left Someone for unknown reasons. It left the worst pain for Someone. But after some times, everything's changed. Someone's turned from an ugly duckling into a lovely swan. When they meet again, the ex sees the change, but the wound which the ex made would never be healed flown away. "It's a fleck on my porcelain skin." Someone said.
This is the song: Your Ex-Lover is Dead by Stars.
God that was strange to see you again
Introduced by a friend of a friend
Smiled and said 'yes I think we've met before'
In that instant it started to pour
Captured a taxi despite all the rain
We drove in silence across Pont Champlain
And all of the time you thought I was sad
I was trying to remember your name...
This scar is a fleck on my porcelain skin
Tried to reach deep but you couldn't get in
Now you're outside me
You see all the beauty
Repent all your sin
It's nothing but time and a face that you lose
I chose to feel it and you couldn't choose
I'll write you a postcard
I'll send you the news
From a house down the road from real love...
Live through this, and you won't look back...
Live through this, and you won't look back...
Live through this, and you won't look back...
There's one thing I want to say, so I'll be brave
You were what I wanted
I gave what I gave
I'm not sorry I met you
I'm not sorry it's over
I'm not sorry there's nothing to save
I'm not sorry there's nothing to save...
Now, Someone has forgotten the ex. Someone's moved on. For someone, the ex is dead. The scar is still there, but Someone will never be the same. The ex? The ex lives in regret. How poor.  -kilaz

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