When Your Life is Filled with Whining and Nagging

Oh, well. Thank you for being here. I just want to share my feeling, as usual. "When Your Life is Filled with Whining and Nagging" is a really suitable title for me. I have been whined and nagged lately. I am not a big fan of better-not-to-mention place, but I'm not a hater also. It's not that I hate the peoples, I just don't like something there, and this something is really hard to explain.

I have read some books, telling that whining just waste our time. True. But it can't help me keep away from doing it. The more I enter the deeper part of the place, the more I found myself disappointed. Sometimes I hope there's a real scene like in the Mean Girl movie when we can reveal what bothers us without being afraid of the bullies. But since we are in the real world where many evil people live, we have to leave it behind.

Just accept what you get. Be grateful of what you have. Not so many people are lucky like me. Moreover, not so many people are unlucky like me. Life is fair though it doesn't seem so. To bury my jealousy and to burn my haughty, I have to believe that He gives what I need, not only what I want. If I can do it, I will live in peace.

A song for your suck ex-lover: I'm not sorry there's nothing to save...

I've found a song when I was watching Daydream Nation movie. The song is cool. It tells about Someone who meet his/her ex-lover long after they broke up. The ex was suck. (S)he left Someone for unknown reasons. It left the worst pain for Someone. But after some times, everything's changed. Someone's turned from an ugly duckling into a lovely swan. When they meet again, the ex sees the change, but the wound which the ex made would never be healed flown away. "It's a fleck on my porcelain skin." Someone said.

This is the song: Your Ex-Lover is Dead by Stars.

God that was strange to see you again
Introduced by a friend of a friend
Smiled and said 'yes I think we've met before'
In that instant it started to pour

Captured a taxi despite all the rain
We drove in silence across Pont Champlain
And all of the time you thought I was sad
I was trying to remember your name...

This scar is a fleck on my porcelain skin
Tried to reach deep but you couldn't get in
Now you're outside me
You see all the beauty
Repent all your sin

It's nothing but time and a face that you lose
I chose to feel it and you couldn't choose
I'll write you a postcard
I'll send you the news
From a house down the road from real love...

Live through this, and you won't look back...
Live through this, and you won't look back...
Live through this, and you won't look back...

There's one thing I want to say, so I'll be brave
You were what I wanted
I gave what I gave

I'm not sorry I met you
I'm not sorry it's over
I'm not sorry there's nothing to save
I'm not sorry there's nothing to save...

Now, Someone has forgotten the ex. Someone's moved on. For someone, the ex is dead. The scar is still there, but Someone will never be the same. The ex? The ex lives in regret. How poor.  -kilaz

What is wrong with you?

You looked unusual today.
You were cold.
You were not cheerful.
You didn't laugh at my silly joke.
You made me worried Honey.
Were you mad at me?
Two days ago, everything seemed okay.
Until yesterday night.
I was being dumb again.
But, we were cool about that.
Hey Honey, I felt like in hell when you were like this.
I felt very guilty.
I really wanted to hear your laugh again.
I didn't want to be like this.
I hated such situation.
I LOVE YOU HONEY.

Date: June, 5th 2011
Time: 10.15 PM

**********

Tuhkan bener. Kamu bilang kamu lagi nggak kenapa2, cuma capek. Ternyata emang lagi bete. Untung semuanya udah beres, hehe. Kamu jangan gitu lagi ah. Kok jadi ketularan aku sih... Well, the best part after fighting is that our love always grows up more and more. -kilaz

This is not a "Bizzare Love Triangle", because no one can slip between us...

 

"We are only humans who have too much love to be shared alone." -kilaz

"Life is a Lie with F"

I just want to be realistic. Life is not "whatever will be will be" just like some people say. We have to set it up. Not to be fake nor to be perfect. For sure, nothing's perfect on Earth. It's just so impossible to make all runs as we wish to. Whatever will be will be might happen, but only if we've tried our best. We can't "just let our lives flow". We have to live it well. You're not gonna waste your time for something you don't wish to happen, are you? Life's so short, don't let it gone by nothing. -kila

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It is true...

...that I always fail to find the reasons why I love you.
...that I am addicted to everything of you. 
...that I am jealous of everybody you're nice to. 
...that I am afraid not to be with you.
...that I love the way you make me feel like a child.
...that I like to stroke your hair.
...that I like to wear your jacket when it's cold.
...that I am worried about you when you're driving too fast.
...that I love the smell of your hair.
...that I miss you every single day I live.
...that I won't let any other girl hold your hand.
...that I love the smell of your clothes.
...that I hate the time when you have to go home.
...that I feel being ignored sometimes.
...that I love to hear your voices before sleeping.
...that I am glad to hear you had stopped smoking.
...that I think that you are super lazy sometimes, hehe.
...that I want to know your family better.
...that I want to be your shoulder to cry on when you're not okay.
...that I am sad when you are sad.
...that I love when saturday comes because I can meet you.
...that I love the way you touch my cheeks.
...that I like to hold your hand.
...that I am happy when you're around.
...that I feel like we are meant for each other.
...that I care a lot about you.
...that I google you whenever I connect to the Internet.
...that I am jealous of all of your ex girlfriends.
...that I am mad to remember that you had ever loved these girls.
...that I am afraid to lose you.
...that I often think you're mad when you're silent.
...that I know many girls like you although you don't.
...that I can't get you out of my mind.
...that I am afraid to lose your love.
...that I love you so much, MP.

It is true that I love him... :*

This is what I accidentally found...

Pas lagi buka-buka tumblrnya temen-temen, gw nemuin tumblr-gw-sendiri. Hahaha. Gw aja lupa pernah bikin. Ternyata, akun yang gw bikin sekitar empat bulan yang lalu itu punya satu postingan yang menarik. Judulnya, Hello, World!. Isinya? Hehe. Nih, kayak gini nih:

"I'm just an ordinary girl. But somehow, I'm special..."

Hmm,  kalo dipikir-pikir, quote gw di atas keren juga. Hihihi. (narsis) -kilaz