What does "past" mean exactly? I have no idea.

Tired. Too tired. I'm tired, but I can't take my eyes off of it. It hurts. Pushing my heart so bad that I can't breath. Past is past. But the past was when I was already there. I don't know how I should feel about this. It lasted, but it still hurts. Yeah, it hurts. And you know what? I didn't regret hating both of them. Or should it be three? He was a jerk once, conciously or unconciously, I don't know. Yeah like I said, past is past. I know it doesn't matter now, but it still hurts me. **widyakilaz** 

I can't help myself out of this heartache. So please, darling. Heal me.

*For you, I'm sorry. I know you love me, but I still can't forget everything. The more I drown myself to it, the more hurt I am. I want to hear your voice, because It strengthen me. But you're busy studying so I just can't tell you right now. I dont want to trouble you, yes I don't. At least you know that I love you. So much. Yeah, I love you that much, thus we need to talk (again). There's still something inside my heart which hasn't gone yet. I need you. I need an answer.